The Hood Has Wings (FICTION
Graphic Designer: Kay P. Beck
I wish my big bro Chuck could’ve seen me today. He would’ve been so proud. Where I’m from graduating high school certifies you as a big homie. Most people either don’t finish high school or the streets take them out before they make it to 18. I guess I got lucky. My brother Charles, we call him Chuck, got knocked by the Feds six years ago. He got sentenced twenty years for drug charges. When he went away, it hit our house hard because he took care of me and Mama. Paid all the bills, made sure I had everything I needed for school, and he was my best friend. We still talk on a burner phone when he calls, but it ain’t the same. He missing everything. I know he would’ve been there at the ceremony with that cheesy grin on his face.
Even though Chuck was in the streets, he always said he didn’t want that life for me. I was never around that stuff. The only friend he brought around the house was Jaleil and he had been around forever. When they had to talk business Chuck always told me to leave the room. I wasn’t green. I knew what was going on. Plus, there are no secrets in the hood. That stuff didn’t interest me anyway. I had seen how it made people unrecognizable. Both the fiends and the dealers. Times were hard when Chuck left. Mama worked as a receptionist at a hotel, but I guess it wasn’t enough to keep the lights on. After about two weeks I got tired of sitting in the dark and got thought about how I could fix them. All I needed to figure out was a way to rig the house without us paying the bill. I did.
Mama came home and didn’t ask no questions. She rarely does. For the most part we don’t even talk. She’s more like my roommate than my Mama. When I turned sixteen she told me I gotta start going half on all the bills, claiming Chuck started pulling his weight at thirteen. She said she ain’t raising no weak men. Raising? Yeah right. It’s weird. I know she my moms and gave birth to me, but I ain’t really ever felt a connection to her. She worshipped the ground Chuck walked on and ignored me. The earliest memories I have of anyone feeding me or putting me to bed was Chuck. I don’t even know if my Mama ever loved me. She ain’t never said it. At this point it don’t matter. I know she don’t. She always said how much I look like my Pops, whoever he is. She always said it like I disgusted her.
Anyway, after I figured out how to get us some electricity, it wasn’t long before I had the house wired to steal wi-fi from our neighbors too. My homeboy asked me to hook his family up too and I did. It became my little side hustle. Me and Jaleil got extra tight when Chuck went away. I didn’t tell him about my side hustle because I wasn’t trying to hear it. Truth be told, he’s the reason why I walked across the stage today. One day he popped up at the house with some money. I don’t know how he knew, but he said rigging houses for electricity ain’t no way for people to live. I told him about what Mama said about me paying bills and he told me not to worry about it. Every first of the month he came with a stack of money, helped me sort through the bills and give Mama her cut. He would even leave some extra and tell me to go buy some new threads. It was no way I was getting the ladies with the rags I had on.
Graphic Designer: Kay P. Beck
After a while Jaleil said I had to earn a living like everyone else and gave me a job after school at his barbershop weeping up hair and other odd ends. He used to give me and Chuck free haircuts, but after I working there he started teaching me how to cut my own hair after he closed the shop. He says a real man shouldn’t have to wait on anyone else to get the job done. Jaleil never talks at me, but to me. He treats me like a man and doesn’t try to shield me from the streets like Chuck did. He keeps it all the way a buck.
“Antwan not knowing can get you killed out here youngin’. The more you know about the streets the more you’ll want to stay away from it. I’m going to teach you the truth. Not the glamorized version, either. Ain’t nothing in it for you. The streets don’t love nobody but the streets.”
He kept his word and I guess it worked. My sophomore year he asked me what I wanted to do when I graduated. I didn’t know. School came easy and I was getting straight A’s. What I knew for sure was that I had to get up out Mama’s house. I still liked tinkering with things from time to time. I figured out how to make the light switch turn on the tv and the power button on the tv turn on the lights. Mama cursed me out, but I thought it was funny. Jaleil suggested I go to school for engineering. I can’t lie, at first the idea scared the hell out of me. I never knew anyone who went to college. I said I would think about it. He wasn’t going. The next day I showed up at the shop and he had a list of the Top 5 HBCU’s for engineering with all the applications printed out and ready for me to fill out.
Looking back, I’m glad he gave me the extra push. I don’t know where I would’ve been without him. Chuck always says we owe Jaleil, but Jaleil says that what family is supposed to do. Mama didn’t come to my graduation. I don’t know why. I told her about it twice, but she ignored me. I came in the house tonight and placed my graduation cap and diploma on the kitchen table. Hopefully she’ll see it. I ended up getting a full ride to North Carolina A&T and Jaleil is driving me down tomorrow and helping me find a summer job. He said he ain’t want to take no chances of trouble finding me this summer. I’m scared, but it can’t be any worse than what I’ve already been through. The hood is familiar. I don’t know what to expect in North Carolina. I don’t know nobody down there. But Jaleil says when you’re uncomfortable that means you’re growing. I guess it’s time to fly.
